Ozzy Osbourne Has Been Unsuccessfully Attempting To Bite The Head Off A Toyota Corolla Car Seat On Instagram Live For The Last Six Hours

Ozzy Osbourne Has Been Unsuccessfully Attempting To Bite The Head Off A Toyota Corolla Car Seat On Instagram Live For The Last Six Hours

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Ozzy Osbourne is definitely one of many best frontmen in rock historical past, however sadly the 72-year-old singer is at present in the course of one thing that will very nicely sully his unbelievable legacy: Ozzy has been unsuccessfully making an attempt to chunk the top off a Toyota Corolla automobile seat on Instagram Stay for the final six hours.

Rattling. Yeah, positively didn’t must run this one again, Ozzy. Simply doing it the one time with the bat was wonderful.

Any self-respecting rock fan can inform you how iconic it was when Ozzy bit the top off a dwell bat throughout a live performance again in 1982, however sadly, the Black Sabbath singer appears intent on tainting that legendary second with the underwhelming sequel that’s at present unfolding. Taking to Instagram Stay simply previous 5 o’clock this morning, standing in his driveway and clearly making an attempt to look concert-ready—leather-based duster, huge cross necklace, but additionally a couple of miserable additions like ratty pajama pants and people grippy sorts of socks they provide out in hospitals—the metallic icon greeted his 4.5 million followers with a spirited, “Hi there, Instagram! Who needs to see me chunk off one thing even greater and cooler than a bat’s head?” From there, he crawled into the backseat of a 1998 Toyota Corolla, fumbled with the radio’s Bluetooth settings till “Mr. Crowley” got here blasting by means of the audio system, clicked his cellphone into a kind of windshield holders that previous folks and Uber drivers like to make use of, and started futilely making an attempt to chunk the headrest off the driving force’s seat.

From the leap, it was clear that Ozzy didn’t perceive the impossibility of what he had got down to do. After throwing up satan horns to the digital camera, Ozzy put the entrance seat in a headlock prefer it was gonna attempt to run away, dramatically lowered his enamel towards it like a vampire, and started simply sort of gnawing and slurping on the headrest for some time. To see the rock legend futilely slobbering throughout a automobile seat for hours on finish has been a fairly large bummer, and sadly he’s nonetheless going at it regardless of getting no nearer to his purpose of biting off the headrest than when he began. Soaked in sweat and gasping for air along with his eyeliner dripping down his face, you gotta think about that this isn’t what he envisioned when he kicked off the stunt. 

Oof. Yeah, if it ain’t broke, don’t repair it, Ozzy. No must relive the glory days. 

Sadly, issues are solely getting an increasing number of miserable, as he’s now pausing each couple of minutes to share little anecdotes with the “crowd” like how singers do at actual concert events, together with one about how arthritis has warped his fingers so badly that he can not take his rings off, and one other about how he nonetheless talks to Randy Rhoads in his desires. Then there’s the truth that the “That is Ozzy Osbourne” Spotify playlist he had going ended hours in the past, so Spotify did that factor the place it begins enjoying similar-ish songs, however six hours in it’s completely greedy at straws and enjoying tremendous non-Ozzy stuff like Genesis and The Jackson 5. In the meantime, the overwhelming majority of feedback he’s receiving from viewers are expressing concern, saying issues like, “Are you okay, Ozzy? Want us to name somebody that will help you?” and “Hey man, you need to prob see a health care provider who focuses on dementia, we’re anxious for you.” Nonetheless, Ozzy stays unfazed and has but to indicate any indicators of slowing down. 

Yeesh. It’s powerful to look at one in every of metallic’s best showmen miss the mark this badly, and for six straight hours and counting. Right here’s hoping Ozzy manages to not less than chunk off a small chunk of the headrest so he can really feel like he obtained a victory, or that his cellphone dies quickly, or {that a} member of the family realizes he’s lacking and involves take him again to his room or one thing. We’re pulling for you, Ozzy! 

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